Set Free To Serve
Here is a story about one of the first pioneers of the Exodus ministry, a non-denominational and international ex-gay ministry that has helped many people come out of homosexuality. The author's name is Roberta Laurila. This is an excerpt from her book, Set Free To Serve, a wonderful example of God's healing love. Enjoy!
SALVATION
I was home alone the afternoon of October 7, 1955. With fear and panic in my heart, I made the decision to take my own life. I was too ashamed to commit myself to an institution to find help for my troubled mind. Pride was still very much alive, even though I thought I was beyond help. I wondered how to call my friend to ask her forgiveness. I wanted so much to be forgiven, but it seemed out of the question.
I started for the kitchen to turn on the gas jets. I had already had a few drinks to try to give me courage. Just before I entered the kitchen door, I fell to my knees in front of a chair. With tears streaming down my face, I cried out, “God forgive me. God forgive me!”
Only later did I realize that I was saved at that moment. The Holy Spirit came to live within me, and began leading me in ways that confirmed my salvation. But in rebellion, I still held onto my old friends.
I had two lesbian relationships after my salvation. “God doesn’t expect me to quit lov- ing women,” I reasoned. Of course, I couldn’t stop without supernatural help. And I didn’t have anyone else to help. This was years before God raised up former homosexuals to begin ministries.
Ten years after I received Jesus as my Savior, I was still living in sin. God began allowing me to feel the consequences of my rebellion. I could not have survived the trauma that followed without the Lord’s care and mercy. God allowed the devil to pour out his wrath in such a devastating way. I still shudder at his trickery. With demonic signs and wonders, Satan convinced me that God was wanting me to live with another woman while involved in Christian ministry.
The climax came following the suicidal death of a dear friend whom I had betrayed. It was from that shocking emotional experience that my stubborn will was broken. I promised God that I would not let her death be for nothing. Then came the vision.
THE VISION
While living in what seemed to be a hell on earth with my lover, God came to me one night. I was alone and in deep despair. The Lord gave me a spiritual vision of a world-wide ministry. This outreach would reach homosexuals who wanted a close relationships with Jesus Christ and who wanted to be set free from their sin.
As the vision unfolded, I knew God was saying I must leave this lifestyle forever. I was to begin interceding for Him to raise up individuals from the gay lifestyle and others, truly called by Him, to begin specific ministries to homosexuals.
Six years after the vision, God directed me to write my personal testimony of deliverance from lesbianism. My story, entitled Gay Liberation, was published in book form in 1975. It was the first of its kind and not many bookstores would accept it, due to the subject which was “hush-hush” at the time.
INTERCESSION
Much has happened since that time. While I continued to intercede, God began calling forth former gays to minister. God has blessed my friendships with many of the “pioneers” in the Exodus movement, such as Frank Worthen, Robbi Kenney, Ed Hurst and others. I have been blessed also to see many ministries begin in foreign soil. What a wonderful God he is!
God has kept me at a low profile. At times, I have rebelled concerning this. But deep down, I know I was called to intercede for others to be led by the Holy Spirit into all the world.
Even as I write these words, tears are flowing down my cheeks. Surely God will complete His perfect plan to reach the many millions of the lost who have been so rejected and lonely so many years. I weep for the church, blinded by the enemy so it cannot see the need to reach gays. So many Christians cannot truly believe that God can set these people free. My great desire now is to reach those in the gay church. I am believing God to also work a miracle there.
Our God reigns!
Additional Information: Roberta is a pioneer in the ex-gay movement. She came out of lesbianism in 1969, long before there were any ex-gay ministries. She passed away in October, 2011.
SALVATION
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| Roberta Laurila Set Free To Serve |
I started for the kitchen to turn on the gas jets. I had already had a few drinks to try to give me courage. Just before I entered the kitchen door, I fell to my knees in front of a chair. With tears streaming down my face, I cried out, “God forgive me. God forgive me!”
Only later did I realize that I was saved at that moment. The Holy Spirit came to live within me, and began leading me in ways that confirmed my salvation. But in rebellion, I still held onto my old friends.
I had two lesbian relationships after my salvation. “God doesn’t expect me to quit lov- ing women,” I reasoned. Of course, I couldn’t stop without supernatural help. And I didn’t have anyone else to help. This was years before God raised up former homosexuals to begin ministries.
Ten years after I received Jesus as my Savior, I was still living in sin. God began allowing me to feel the consequences of my rebellion. I could not have survived the trauma that followed without the Lord’s care and mercy. God allowed the devil to pour out his wrath in such a devastating way. I still shudder at his trickery. With demonic signs and wonders, Satan convinced me that God was wanting me to live with another woman while involved in Christian ministry.
The climax came following the suicidal death of a dear friend whom I had betrayed. It was from that shocking emotional experience that my stubborn will was broken. I promised God that I would not let her death be for nothing. Then came the vision.
THE VISION
While living in what seemed to be a hell on earth with my lover, God came to me one night. I was alone and in deep despair. The Lord gave me a spiritual vision of a world-wide ministry. This outreach would reach homosexuals who wanted a close relationships with Jesus Christ and who wanted to be set free from their sin.
As the vision unfolded, I knew God was saying I must leave this lifestyle forever. I was to begin interceding for Him to raise up individuals from the gay lifestyle and others, truly called by Him, to begin specific ministries to homosexuals.
Six years after the vision, God directed me to write my personal testimony of deliverance from lesbianism. My story, entitled Gay Liberation, was published in book form in 1975. It was the first of its kind and not many bookstores would accept it, due to the subject which was “hush-hush” at the time.
INTERCESSION
Much has happened since that time. While I continued to intercede, God began calling forth former gays to minister. God has blessed my friendships with many of the “pioneers” in the Exodus movement, such as Frank Worthen, Robbi Kenney, Ed Hurst and others. I have been blessed also to see many ministries begin in foreign soil. What a wonderful God he is!
God has kept me at a low profile. At times, I have rebelled concerning this. But deep down, I know I was called to intercede for others to be led by the Holy Spirit into all the world.
Even as I write these words, tears are flowing down my cheeks. Surely God will complete His perfect plan to reach the many millions of the lost who have been so rejected and lonely so many years. I weep for the church, blinded by the enemy so it cannot see the need to reach gays. So many Christians cannot truly believe that God can set these people free. My great desire now is to reach those in the gay church. I am believing God to also work a miracle there.
Our God reigns!
Additional Information: Roberta is a pioneer in the ex-gay movement. She came out of lesbianism in 1969, long before there were any ex-gay ministries. She passed away in October, 2011.
Thank you so much for posting this. I learned a lot and I think Roberta must be in heaven for all she did!
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