Where There Is Love
Hey - I've been involved of late talking to (debating with) men and women who disagree with my opinions about same sex attraction and other conditions or considered anomalies like transgender issues, bisexuals, fetishes, etc.
Talks get heated, feelings hurt and motives questioned. But there is one ingredient with the most sincere individuals that acts as a salve allowing the communication to flourish. On the flip side, when the magic ingredient is missing or lacking, the conversations invariably turn ugly and nothing of any benefit is produced.
LOVE is that magic element - I can't belive how cliche that sounds. Call it charity if you want, but no matter what you call it, get some. Remind yourself of it when you are communicating your thoughts on subjects of SSA et al. Without it we can't begin to understand each other.
I have found it is extremely personal for most people who even bother to debate or take a stand or investigate their own thinking. People who suffer, people who watch others suffer, people who feel they can help, people of conviction convinced of their personal truth, and people who believe it is their business to lead others.
JMO - When you find yourself sparring with someone over your beliefs and knowledge of SSA, take time to delve into their personal motives and experiences. If its online ask them in a PM to share with you if they will their personal reasons for beliveing as they do. This is where the empathy is born and LOVE is right behind empathy. It's how we're programmed.
Take time to KNOW the other guy and maybe we can all cool off the heat in these discussions and actually gain some ground in changing hearts and minds, in growing, and in finding ways to heal wounds.